Pain comes in different shapes. It comes when you are hurt, when you lose somebody that you love, when you get disappointed, when you miss somebody, when you make mistakes maybe,  when you take the wrong decisions and so on. It comes and goes. You don’t need to be fearless or sort of a superhero to recognize when you are in pain. Myself, I hardly knew how to identify when and if I was in pain. I was constantly saying to myself that this shall pass too, that I am strong enough to deal with it. The biggest pain, that type of pain that rips you apart, but about which you have no clue that it can be so strong, I felt it when I lost my father a couple of years ago. Few knew at that time how painful the moment was. Neither did I. I remember I went to my therapist soon after the moment. I remember telling her how much I understand the situation but now I realize how less I felt it. I buried the pain alongside with my dad. Terrible moments about which I didn’t speak with anybody. Not from my heart, as I thought it will pass faster like this. Not even among my family. The only thing I knew was that everyone around me needs support. But what do you do with the pain? Where all the pain that you don’t cry out, remains into your body? 

Years after that experience I realized it can be all in your body, but I guess it’s mostly into your heart and your breath. I mean, those vital things you can’t live without. You might wonder why am I writing this now and not at that time? Because I wasn’t ready, till now, to recognize, in front of all of you, those that are reading my thoughts, how painful that was. And I am not saying this for you to show me pity, but just for you to know that healing from pain takes time. But healing at a deeper level is possible. But taking your time is okay. There is nothing wrong with you. From my perspective, showing that you are healed although you are not, is the biggest betrayal towards yourself. I see more and more people around me that have tones of feelings buried into their bodies that in the end will come out. That is why I encourage people to be true to themselves and to others, as well. Don’t let the pain, the fear, the frustration grow inside you just because you heard that life it is like this and the only thing you can do is to move on. Yes, I couldn’t agree more. But in order to move on, the first step that needs to be done is to stay with these feelings, accept them and after that move on.

I so much believe that one of the causes of people diseases nowadays is rejection and denial of what they really feel. They run away from this pain in whatever external things they find: social media, alcohol, food, sex, pornography and the list could continue. I realize more and more how much we need to tell the truth. To ourselves and to the ones around us. I understand more and more how important it is to face what we feel. Because the moment you know exactly how you feel, you are going to figure out how you don’t want to feel anymore, if the case. Or the opposite, you want to make that positive feeling be a constant in your life. But how could you do this, if you don’t know how to recognize them? And from this point onwards, when you can understand what you really feel, put that energy and commitment of creating every single day that reality that you love, that you want, that you cherish and never regret. It’s all on you, on every choice you make, on every thought you have. 

My main goal with this article was to inspire you to speak your real story, your true self. To feel the pain if it needs to be felt, to feel the joy, the fear, the excitement. To feel. And to look deep inside yourself, so that you find that real strength that will transform your life. And when I say real, I mean that one felt by you, not the one that people tell you to show.  We all make mistakes, we all have moments of confusion. But we all have as well, the power to change the direction we are going towards. 

I know exactly how this feels, but the choice is yours. Be real and tell me: which was the most painful thing that you had to go through? And from here , let’s then build a new story that will make yourself proud! Do you want a life aligned with your true-self? You hope to live such a life? Don’t hope! Have faith YOU can do it! YOU can create it. Share your story at contact@andreeanegoita.ro and let’s rewrite your story like never before! And if you think you can’t do it now or if you think you lack the courage, this is exactly where the strength is. Speak your truth, feel your feelings! Just do it! Don’t live in a reality that you build by mistake. Don’t face reality, but create it! Are you ready?

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